Monday, 7 April 2014

Plancenoit Libre! : Part the Final

Plancenoit Daily Blurb headline: 'Young Guard don't get any older!'. Our on-the-spot reporter, fashion and lifestyles editor, Xavier Stilo filed the story.
 "Very dark blue is in this season but the choice of trim is all yours....
 Pirch, this particular catwalk commander, is followed into action by a very smart entourage with an off-the-shoulder extra large flag. Seems to be saying - if you've got it (the glossy paper and ink) flaunt it."
 "The rest of Lobau's troops fall back on Plancenoit (in white chinos - so passe) having lost the church to Bulow's Prussian spearhead..."
 "The town square was very quickly occupied by the retreating French (not even time for the odd throw rug)

 "Meanwhile, on the left flank of the town, the French Corps artillery made the Prussians pay for every move
 "Innovative use of the throw corpse as they defend the square...
 "In come the the Young Guard (sporting practical greatcoats...see weather report on page 2) and advance to throw out the Prussians occupying the graveyard...
 "To crys of 'Vive l'Empereur' they launch themselves into the attack...
 "..and get mown down into a heap (see council recycling uplift times on page 4)
 "The square too falls to the Prussian attack...
 "Finally, one Young Guard Battalion has more success and carries all before it throwing the Prussians clean out of the churchyard....
 They have little enough time to set up defence when in comes a multiple Prussian attack
 Pirch's columns are fresh and eager ( see Plancenoit Express deals coupons off deodorant and  coffee on page 8)
 "They coordinate columnar attacks....
 with close artillery support...."
 French gunners fight to the end as, out of the smoke (see 'Plain Packaging Debate' editorial page 3) they realise they are being outflanked.
 "It's just a matter of moments before the inevitable collapse...
 Renewed attacks on the graveyard...
 " The old Guard arrive in time to support the young...
 ...and take back the square...
 "Pirch throws in a massive attack....but wheels some troops to his left to try an opposite side outflanking move...
 "The fight is short and fierce...
  ...a Prussian victory as they bounce the enemy out...
...but ends in death to all the Young Guard...
 "The Old Guard get the square but are now faced with taking back the churchyard...
 "It is only then that they realise that they the enemy in front of, and behind, them....
 The Prussians are fresh...
 ...and the outflanking move comes to fruition...."

I was so excited at this point I forgot to take a picture of the end of the Guard. The Prussians were in complete control of Plancenoit and all the Guard battalions sent to restore the situation were completely wiped out along with nearly all Lobau's Corps and the Corps Artillery reserve.

What this may have meant in terms of the whole battle one can but speculate. By this time the Imperial Guard attack on Mt. St. Jean ridge may have succeeded or failed. Result: Glut of horse meat burgers in Plancenoit Express Supermarche and bumper edition of 'Items bought and sold' - page 10 to 58)

My thanks to all who took part. Laughs and groans all round.

Next time: We'll set the Corps out in their orders to find out what we still need to do to complete the lineup for the '100 Days 2015'.

Friday, 4 April 2014

Contact! - Plancenoit Part Two: Muffling in the Field

 Sounds like a town twinning organisation but is in fact our Prussian hero arranging a shock for Boney.
Ziethen's 1st Corps arrives in force armed with orders to take Plancenoit in concert with Bulow and Pirch's Corps.
 Fighting hard the French fall back in the face of superior forces.
 Subervie's cavalry gets excited and makes a lunge for the Prussian cavalry...(note to self - more Prussian cav)
 Prussian's push the French without pause.
'Here's that sugar lump I promised'
 Muffling makes contact....
 ...and begins to convince Ziethen to go against his written orders from Gneisenau. Instead of following Bulow and Pirch to Plancenoit...join the end of the Allied line so that the Allies can close up and move two cavalry brigades to the right centre of the line against imminent major attack.
 Ziethen must choose to not support the furiously fighting Prussians but help shore up the Allied line.
 Bulow batters on taking huge casualties but wearing down Lobau.
 The last of D'Erlon's Corps support the gathering French attack by pressuring Picton's Division
 Plancenoit is set alight.
The Prussian are through Lobau and are in! But the Young Guard approach for the counter attack....


Can the Guard thrown them out?
Is the church to hot to handle?
How are these jokes so bad?

Tune in next time for the exciting, nail biting and tense conclusion...oh, I need the loo...